why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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