Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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