he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
