So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
