i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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