come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
