The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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