Umm I'm too high to move.
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
