Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Randomize
