he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
