New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
