So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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