is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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