Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
