haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
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