Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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