New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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