I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
