Hey man sorry I got all grabby
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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