I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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