I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
