wakey wakey hands off snakey
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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