so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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