She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
