Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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