I have demons in me.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize