Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
