So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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