i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
