I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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