Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
