spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
