Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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