That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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