my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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