I think scott just propositioned me for sex
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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