didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
