I only kidnapped one of them. chill
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I said "one day" and that day is not today
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
