so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
love makes seman taste better
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
