In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
