The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
