I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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