I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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