so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize