He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
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