It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
