plz talk dirty to me
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize