ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
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