When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
