It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
COCAINE IS GR8
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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