shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Randomize
